Domestic Violence Awareness

Domestic Violence Awareness

SOME WARNING SIGNS OF DATING/DOMESTIC VIOLENCE

Does your partner:

Insult you in public and private?
Check up on where youÍve been and whom youÍve talked to?
Put down your friends and family?
Limit where you can go and what you can do?
Destroy your belongings?
Tell you jealousy is a sign of love?
Touch you in a way that hurts your or scares you?

If you experience any of these behaviors, please remember you are not alone!

Protect yourself and get help!

The 3 Stage Cycle of Abuse

Does this sound like your life or the life of a friend?

Stage 1:
Tension Building:
The abuser is irritated by trivial matters, is verbally abusive, jealous and makes irrational accusations. The victim may internalize appropriate anger and have tension, anxiety, depression, headaches or other symptoms. Eventually minor episodes of violence increase, such as pinching, slapping or shoving.

Stage 2:
Acute Battering:
This explosion of anger and violence can last for hours or even weeks. It is the most dangerous stage, and may even result in murder. The victim may or may not fight back. She finds herself in a state of physical and psychological shock.

Stage 3:
Loving Reconciliation:
A "cooling off" period, also known as the "Honeymoon" stage. Both parties are relieved that "itÍs over", and the relationship improves. The abuser is sorry and fearful his partner will leave him. He becomes attentive, romantic and promises to change. This stage lasts days to weeks, before the cycle repeats.

Did you know that domestic violence results in more injuries to women than auto accidents, muggings and rapes combined? And this is at the hand of the one that the woman is supposed to feel safe and protected with. The average national statistic shows that 1 in 3 women are victims in their own home. It doesnÍt matter what educational or financial level, or what religion or belief system the family has. The numbers parallel inside and outside the church. Abuse is not a private matter Æ itÍs a crime! And if itÍs ignored, the violence usually gets worse.

Every year, 2.8 million American women are abused by their partners. Boys that witness domestic violence are 1000 times more likely to become abusers in their relationships. Girls that witness domestic violence are much more likely to choose an abusive partner. What can be done about this epidemic? The victim and their children need to be given, not only safety but also the tools to break free of this vicious cycle.

With these kinds of statistic we know that all of us work, worship and attend school with victims and the perpetrators. WeÍve all seen the signs; (Please see side box with Warning signs) this makes it our business to know what resources are out there to help these hurting families.

Some of our communities have shelters to provide safety. These can be found in your phone book or by calling your local police department. Every state has a network of resources that can help families who are engaged in abusive relationships. (See National DV Hotline number below.) The sad statistic is that a large number of women receive help in shelters that are not equipped to give them the tools they need to build a new life for themselves. So many will return to the dangerous relationship when they leave the safe house.

Polly's Place Ministries Inc. is glad to present a solution to this bleak picture. They offer Cookie's Retreat Center, a Christian healing retreat for women and their children. This program offers a safe retreat for up to eight weeks, individual and group counseling, educational programs, and legal and resource advocacy within the community. All of this is offered in a non-judgmental, completely confidential, family environment. We have sponsorships available because we want this service accessible to all women regardless of their financial situation.

If you need help for yourself or a friend, or if you would like to help this non-profit ministry heal broken lives please contact us at:

Cookie's Retreat Center
PO Box 19471
Spokane WA 99219

24hr. crisis: 1-866-625-6333

Visit us at our Web: www.ppmin.org

Email us at: retreatcenter@ppmin.org

National Domestic Violence Hotline 1-800-799-SAFE (7233)
TDD 1-800-787-3224

National Domestic Violence Coalition
PO Box 18749
Denver, CO 80218-0749
(303)-839-1852

For additional abuse related resources, click here to view LoveTakesTime.com's Resources page.